TO LOVE SOMEONE. (2007)
DIRECTED BY AKE SANDGREN.
STARRING SOFIA LEDARP, JONAS KARLSSON AND ROLF LASSGARD.
REVIEW BY SANDRA HARRIS. ©
I loved this ninety-minute Swedish language film about an abused woman called Lena. She’s in her late thirties and, when her violent ex, Hannes, is sent to prison for basically battering her half to death and putting her in hospital, she builds a new life and a new relationship with a kind and decent older man called Alf.
Now, however, Hannes has been set free, after complying with the prison’s therapy programme for domestic abusers. Lena is, unsurprisingly, on edge about his upcoming release, but Alf, a fish shop owner in his early fifties who has given her a secure home with him, assures her that she will be safe and he will protect her. Lena has clearly landed on her feet with Alf, a devoted boyfriend and unstinting provider.
But, when a free Hannes starts to pop up in different places around town, Lena doesn’t seem to be able to keep away from him. She follows him to his new apartment and visits him there, even though one of the conditions of Hannes’ release is that he stays the hell away from Lena because they bring out the worst in each other.
Soon, Hannes and Lena are back sleeping together and Alf, guessing where she’s been, is heart-broken about it. He and Lena fight, and a frustrated Alf even demands to know if it’s the violence she misses, and he offers to beat her like Hannes did if that’s what she wants. Things are really messed up between them at this point.
Lena promises to stay away from Hannes, but she just can’t seem to do it. It’s so disrespectful to poor Alf, who calls to see Hannes and gets a hiding for his trouble. In retaliation, Alf hires a couple of goons to beat up Hannes. It’s a circle of violence that no-one can really win.
Lena decides to leave Alf and go back to Hannes, which causes her three stalwart female friends to wash their hands of her. You can’t blame them. They don’t want to watch their best friend die. But now Alf has been to see an unsavoury character and bought a gun…
This is such a true-to-life drama. It asks the question: why do women go back to their abusers? Why do they defend them with their last breath? Surely women don’t enjoy being hit, so why do they go back? Is their self-esteem so low that they feel like these violent relationships are all they deserve?
In TO LOVE SOMEONE, Alf and Lena go to Hannes’s parole officer with the intention of complaining about Hannes’ ‘stalking’ of Lena (it’s really Lena stalking Hannes), but, when it comes right down to it, Lena rushes out of the meeting in distress, after refusing point-blank to make any more trouble for Hannes.
I don’t know. I’ve done some things in my own life, as regards relationships, that I must have been mad to do but I did them anyway, including but not limited to taking back some well dodgy blokes that I should have ditched instead, but whatever. A woman’s heart is as deep as the ocean. Now I want to re-watch TITANIC, lol. Happy viewing.
sandrafirstruleoffilmclubharris 